Henry McCullough

David Holmes awesome collaboration with BP Fallon from the “Late Night Tales” compilation right here. Beautiful. All I have to say. Nothing funny. That’s it.

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People are stupid

Just saying. Engaging with idiots who have stoopid, unresearched, bigoted, ignorant opinions is not as clever as you think. You think you’re clever holding the moral high ground but you are pissing against the wind or pointlessly fighting to hold back the sea. I know nothing, but what I do know is fascists don’t have much perspective. So why be their Facebook friend? Stretch serious tonight…

It’s a movie: Wiener-Dog

wiener-dog-movie-1A man said to me today, “Y’now, it’s Pierce Brosnan. He’s not a woman.” I kind of understood what he meant but at the same time I backed away with the speed of a prom queen in a slasher movie. So, this is not to be confused with the excellent documentary “Weiner,” about Anthony Weiner’s penis. This story of poor Wiener-Dog or as they say in Irlanda Cú-Sausage is an anxiety-filled ride taking in all that exists in Todd Solondz’s’s’s universe including dysfunctional families, some more dysfunctional families and eventually dys family ain’t no fun. Actually, they are. Greta Gerwig fulfils her role as indie darling by playing an indie darling doing her best to hide behind that indie darling. Most actors would look affected if they played the parts Gerwig does, but she seems to perfectly inhabit any character’s awkward angst with world-weary knuckle chewing. She seems at home with the inevitability of things going wrong as if a win is something other people achieve. The Culkin who is not that Culkin looks like he has been dragged screaming from some fountain of youth. Surely those kids are in their 70s by now. wienerAlso, Ellen Burstyn appears in the final act as kind of an end-of-days version of her end-of-days character in “Requiem for a Dream.” Everything in Todd Solondz’s Universe is supposed to jar and this film seems a bit lighter than say “Happiness.” Later as I walked my own helmeted dog while handing off strangers and screaming at traffic, I thought about “Wiener-Dog.” In a Solondz movie, you miss a lot. So, what the fuck was that bit about? Why was that guy’s brother into THAT extremely violent video game? What was his wife scared of? Why did they do what they did at the end so many fucking times? Why is Tracy Letts in everything, yet I can’t remember what? Finally, in my 40s I have now learned that I have always thought Julie Delpy was Julie Delphy. Not as easy to put into a dishwasher. How dumb am I? The film is owned by Danny DeVito who really has gone past all that 80s and 90s stuff and become a brilliant actor. Wonder what Rhea Perlman is up to? I miss her. As for Arnold, well.

VERDICT: Great date movie if the relationship is going nowhere fast

NOTE: Do not confuse this movie with “Wiener Dog Nationals” and vice-versa!

Roads to nowhere

“How can it feel, this wrong?”

Two versions of the same song. Portishead and Gone is Gone doing “Roads.” Mastodon’s Troy Sanders may not have Beth Gibbon’s beauteous voice, but when a song is this strong, it’s hard to do a bad job of it. Makes you want to curl into a ball and chew on Xanax, which is never a bad thing. I have stomach cramps today, so I think this is a song about that, because how can it feel, how can it feel, this wrong?

Michael Viney Nightmares: The first

hboschEyes! Eyes! Eyes! Eyes! Eyes on nature!

I came across an odd looking three-cornered leek beside a small stream in Slievemore, on Achill. I didn’t realise they bloomed in February. Loki Laufeyson, Port Oriel.
Also called three-cornered garlic, it migrated to Achill during the last ice age.


I was walking on Gurteen beach when I came upon significant numbers of Velella and another jelly, probably Pelagia. I don’t remember seeing these in midwinter. The water does seem a little warmer than in other years. Well to me anyway. That’s the only opinion I can take. Isiah Whitlock Jr, Baltimore, Co. Cork.
Strandings of both jellyfishies are more usual in Autumn. Their late arrival may well be due to rising ocean temperatures.
So.

Is it unusual to have sweet peas in my garden on February 1st? Is it? Is it? They were always finished by mid-September, but I’m looking through my net curtain and they’re still there. Edward Woodstock, The Duchy, Co. Dublin.
We have had unusual autumn and winter weather. Enjoy it if you can. If not, well.

goldenretreiverphotosuntitled

We would be extremely grateful if you could identify the creatures in a photograph that I took last autumn using only a camera. Alfred Stieglitz, Hoboken, New Ross, Co. Wexford.
They are caterpillars of the scalloped oak moth. Do not touch them in spring as they tend to be poisonous when their attitude is not right. They shed their body weight in April and demand long walks of their owners. Nothing a quick swipe with a newspaper won’t cure.

I have two nesting boxes in the garden, yet neither of them has ever been used. I have moved them away from the feeding tray, but still to no avail. Ali Al-Habsi, The High Cross, Dundalk, Co. Louth.
Jesus Christ Ali. Nesting boxes should NOT be placed in direct sunlight and should be sheltered from prevailing winds in some cover. Do NOT get them wet and for God sake do NOT feed them after midnight. Otherwise it is a matter of luck if bird-like creatures may choose them. It’s all about luck really.

apoca

I noticed that the playground in Bushy Park in Terenure (pictured)  is ring-fenced by dark green Rentokil boxes. Surely rodent-control measures like this can have a knock-on effect on wildlife in the park. Harold Bishop, Harold’s Cross, Melbourne.
Is that where you live? Do you need help? DM me.

When we came across a common toad in our garden last year I thought we might be mistaken. I came across it again this year. Maddy Albright, Prague, Czech Republic.
Is there an actual question here, Maddy? Or are you just telling me stuff? Maddy?

I’m very lonely. Anne Francis Frank, Frankfurtplasse, Frankfurt, France.
Anne, I’m very lonely too. Don’t despair.

Every morning I feed this fox (photo attached) who visits my garden, but despite a diet of cheese, table scraps like bread and wine, I’ve noticed that his droppings are everywhere and can be rather large. Don Osmond, Ogden, Utah.
For real, Donnie? Fuck off Donny. Idiot.giraffefuckers

 

I watched rooks collecting acorns from an oak tree. The acorns on the ground have peck marks. What other birds eat acorns? Mr Thos Oakenshield, Durin, Co. Carlow.
Eh, Jays, wood pigeons, great spotted woodpeckers. I dunno, cats, dinosaurs, rainbows, barristers, baristas, Bobby Vinton. Who cares?

I watched a grey squirrel on a yew tree eat his way through the berries that the mistle thrush usually has to himself until the redwings arrive. Dr J. Ndmarychain, East Kilbride, Scotlandlandland.
Really? Did you? And you felt you needed to tell everybody? Well, thanks. You have performed a service to humanity that will be unequaled. The Geneva Convention, the Paris Peace treaty? Fuck them. Nothing compared to you. Do I sound sarcastic? Fuck this, I’m out of here. I think Nathan Fake is playing.

Rosemary? No.The president? No.

hong-kong-phooey
Seems like we need this guy more than ever. The biggest worry at the moment is that the Tangerine Ballbag will slow down and get off the cameras for a while, thereby causing the resistance to lose impetus. Fight this generation of scum. Politics is for other munkis, but a lot of shit head politicians all around the world have been ignoring protests for a while now and have figured out that they can get away with not all, but a lot. The Annoying Orange in the White House has taken this in and due to hisunparalleled narcissism must remain in the public eye. Everything is tainted now. Stretch sees the Clementine Fucktard many times a day now. Soon he will be on giant posters in town squares. Fuck this guy. Fuck these fascists. Fuck all y’all. Don’t go to sleep.

Hong Kong Phooey for President of the self-styled ‘greatest country on Earth.’ Blah!